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Table Manners
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Stealing Bar GlassesHow bad is it to pilfer pints? |
Dear Helena,
I just moved into an apartment with two roommates, and I was dismayed to discover there are only two drinking glasses. We need new ones, and my roommates aren’t about to pitch in. However, I’m saving up for a trip right now and I don’t want to spring for new glasses myself.
My boyfriend told me I should just take them from a bar. “They won’t notice. They budget for that sort of thing,” he told me blithely. Can I just go and help myself? What’s the best way to do this: take a large purse? What should I say if I get caught? —Bar Burglar
Dear Bar Burglar,
Obviously we’re not going to tell you that you can steal stuff. But, on the other hand, who hasn’t taken the odd souvenir from a bar? Let’s face it, it’s a relatively petty crime.
Zan Sterling, general manager of Zeitgeist, a popular bar in San Francisco, estimates that a beer pint costs the bar less than $2 to replace. And if the glasses are promotional items for a beer company, the bar gets them for free. So if you take those, you’re only stiffing the beer company (although the bar still has the hassle of replacing them).
If caught helping yourself to a glass, the most you’re likely to risk is embarrassment. The bar managers I talked to said they would not call the police. Brian Nicholas, the sommelier at Village, a bistro and wine bar in San Jose, California, says when he catches someone strolling off the premises with one of his $5 Riedel glasses, he handles the customer with kid gloves: “I diplomatically let them know they can’t leave with glassware and all alcoholic beverages have to be consumed on site.” At the most, you’ll get a scolding.
Those who do steal glasses recommend that you don’t tuck a pint in your backpack; if the item is discovered, it will be harder to explain away. Instead, just saunter out the door with your glass in hand. If a staff member catches you, all you need to do is say: “Wow, I must be drunker than I thought!”
Ultimately, however, stealing glassware is a lame thing to do, especially if you’re talking about creating a whole set at home. A six-pack of glasses from Ikea will cost you a measly $3.99, so is it really worth ripping off your local bar? While we can rationalize that a bar owner won’t notice a missing beer mug or two, losses from theft and breakages can add up: Sterling estimates that Zeitgeist has spent $3,000 on glassware in the past three months. And you can’t claim, Robin Hood–style, that your victim is the enemy: If you drink there, then you’re stealing from a place that you presumably like.
Table Manners appears every Wednesday. Have a Table Manners question? Email Helena.
People steal pint glasses? Oh honey, come to me, I have those damn things coming out of my ears! My beer geek, beer judge, homebrewing husband somehow ends up with free pint glasses for everywhere. Every commercial or homebrew festival, open house or more, we get more damn pint glasses, and tulip glasses, and half pints, and steins, and English pints, and kolsh glasses, and imperial pints and more.
then everyone who travels anywhere and visits a bar or brewery BUYS US MORE. We get them as gifts, doo dads, wish you were here..whatever.
If you are short of glasses, dump your thieving boyfriend and hook up with a beer geek. You'll never be short of glasses ever again. I could use a new pit glass every meal and not run out for a damn month.
And God, don't get me started on the caplifters, bottle openers and beer t shirts!
Amen, Diana. Asking to purchase or take a souvenir beer glass from your favorite establishment is one thing. I've done that, and usually servers and bartenders are usually accomodating. But just taking it is supremely lame, especially for someone past his/her drunken college years. If Bar Burglar is really hard up for free glasses, she should check Craigslist. There are always people moving out of their homes who are eager to unload kitchenware.
Drunkenly stealing a glass from a bar is a rite of passage. Period.
Sure, but deliberately setting out to do it to furnish your home is a whole other issue.
If you can afford to buy the drink at the bar you can afford to buy glasses!
Just skip the bar visit one night and use the money you would have spent to buy glasses ;)
What estnet said! And if Ikea or Target are out of your price range, try a thrift shop. There are alternatives to stealing. (Can this possibly be a real question?)
From Helena: If a staff member catches you, all you need to do is say: “Wow, I must be drunker than I thought!”
No, Helena doesn't advocate stealing beer glasses, but she does advocate lying. And, no, I've never stolen anything from a bar.
I have no moral compunction about stealing glasses from a bar, but I do have an aesthetic issue with furnishing my home with cheap glassware. So no, don't do it.
"But, on the other hand, who hasn’t taken the odd souvenir from a bar?"
Unless you count a book of matches from the pile on the way out, I haven't, and would never dream of stealing a souvenir. I was raised better than that. The glasses are someone else's property, and it just plain isn't nice to take other people's things. Helena is right that it's a petty crime... petty larceny, in fact. If someone was to steal glassware, and it came to light that they got the idea by reading this article (especially the fourth paragraph) I'm pretty sure that would make dear Helena, bless her heart, an accessory to theft.
If you like the glasses and want some, just ask the staff. They'll likely be happy to either sell or give you some if they can spare some.
"Drunkenly stealing a glass from a bar is a rite of passage. Period. "
Exactly. Its something you do in college basically as a dare, not to furnish your grown up apartment. And seriously, why would you be stupid enough to write an advice columnist to ask advice on this tricky moral dilemma? I think she and loser boyfriend are peas in a pod.
Some would say that driving drunk is a rite of passage. I guess it's ok to do that as well.
How can someone pay the rent and utilities if he can't even afford to go to a cheap-ass discount store and buy drinking glasses?
Stealing as a rite of passage? That has got to be one the stupidest things I have ever heard. Seriously, say it slowly and out loud to yourself.
Based on this reasoning, why not steal flatware or silverware from the local restaurant? Same thing, right? But we don't because it's not normal, dishonest, and it makes you a douche who won't go to Target and spend the $8 for a complete set.
Just go to IKEA or something to furnish your home, six glasses is cheaper than the beer you bought to get the one pint glass. Go crazy and buy yourself some plates too so you don't have to steal from the cafe around the corner.
BS question, followed by BS answer.
BTW, stealing is always wrong.
You guys are a bunch of geeks. Period.
Did I hear correctly? ajs actually claims a petty souvenir theft is the moral equivalent to drunken driving? Whew!
Pffft. Stealing pint glasses is nothing. Call me when you lift an unopened bottle of Cabernet (which I've done).
Seriously, though, grow up. Get a sleeve of keg cups from the 7-Eleven to tide you over until you can get to Ikea, Goodwill, or Purple Heart and buy some real grown-up glasses like an adult.
Wow. I probably should have posted that stealing bar glasses leads to hard drug use.
Let's see, Helena thinks it's ok to lie, steal, and break promises to one's friends. Wow. I wish Chow would replace her with someone who doesn't suck.
JK Grence, you are to legal advice what Helena is to Table Manners. Helena clearly isn't risking accomplice liability for her article. Open a book before you point your finger.
really want the glass? try talking to your bt/server (preferably after tipping them a time or two) and commenting-- "wow this pint glass displays the emblem of my fave beer/local microbrew/whatever. it's really pretty. i'd like to have a glass like it to drink from at home. would you guys sell me one or two?"
the staff member will probably *give* you a glass, probably new, or at least clean, in a bag (if the glass was a promo item given by the brewery to the bar), or if it's an item the bar paid for, sell it to you for a very reasonable price (again new/clean, bagged).
then you can walk out of the door like a respectable patron, not a slinking, dish-pinching jackass.
at some nightclubs with serious security, trying to walk out with a drink glass in your hand is a not-so-bright way of getting to know the bouncers better. and speaking of legality, stealing a glass, or a salt shaker, or whatever, from a bar is petty theft-- but i'd be *way* more worried about getting into a car with an empty pint glass with beer traces all over it. last i checked, at least in my area, that goes to "open bottle" laws, which certainly can have serious legal consequences.
get your "souvenir" in a legit way. people shouldn't think it's okay to steal a pint glass from a bar any more than it's okay to steal the $10 "souvenir" t-shirt. or stay home and drink your pbr out of the can for a day or two, take the $3 you save and buy some clearance glasses. . .
How about use plastic cups until you can afford some glasses? I mean, you can only steal one, maybe two glasses at a time, right? And you'd have to buy the booze that goes in those glasses. So, after 4-5 drinks, you could have just as easily gone and bought a set of glasses at Target.
Or, try a yard sale. Craigslist.
I think everyone stole a bar glass at some point, either accidentally or on a dare. But there's a difference in doing a stupid thing once on the spur of the moment and premeditating the theft of a whole set of bar glasses.
Which makes me think the brains behind this column start with real situations, then write them into ridiculously absurd questions.
Should I furnish my apartment by stealing from my favorite bar, because I'm too poor to buy a 25 cent glass from Salvation Army, but not too poor to drink in a bar. Jesus fucking christ on a cracker. I repeat my comment from last week - maybe it's time to retire this column if these really are the best questions you're getting.
Personally, I love Helena's columns and these admittedly (sometimes) inane questions and the equally (sometimes) inane, unfiltered responses. I look forward to reading the new question every week. Don't stop, Helena! You know you've got something going when you get the kinds of responses you do!
well...is it going to be cheaper to pay $10 for a 6 pack of glasses at target or to pay at least $5-6 for a drink at a bar to be able to steal ONE glass? hmm...
And to springboard off gloriousfood's comment, I enjoy reading the shitstorm of comments every week, which I suspect has become the point.
Really? This is even a question that someone needs to ask?
Yeah it's pretty awesome. More, Helena! We need more replies from the TAKING! IT! PERSONALLY! crew! :P
Does Helena get paid for this column? May I suggest getting interested CHOW members to provide the same service for free? Surely the quality couldn't get any worse.
"I’m saving up for a trip right now and I don’t want to spring for new glasses myself."
This is the line that slayed me.
Lucky location perhaps, but there are a lot of places in Atlanta that offer a keep the glass special, the most well known is Taco Mac. Every Thursday they offer a new featured beer. Order a pint, keep the glass. (one per person, but if you have a nice server, they'll hook you up with more) Before you know it, you'll have way more than you need.
Go to www.freecycle.org and find your local recycling board. People post all kinds of stuff they want to just give away!! I use mine all the time and it has helped de-clutter my house, and I feel good knowing the stuff is getting reused instead of ending up in a landfill.
Looks like there are two types of people reading this column--those who think one should be responsible and buy their own stuff and those who think stealing is okay.
How is it different from shoplifting? I bet those who are in the latter group are the one who bitch and moan when bars/restaurants raise prices. Yah, yah, I know, what's a glass here and there? Not much, but it adds up because many people have that mentality.
Grow the hell up. If you're old enough to be on your own, you're old enough to supply your own kitchenware, etc.
Two words. Kerns. Smuckers.
piccola, you think incorrectly.
Also, in response to the "right of passage" crap: that's neither a reason nor a defense for anything. ajs wasn't asserting that drunken driving and stealing a glass from a bar are morally equivalent (but nice phrase) ajs was asserting that claiming "its a right of passage" about something illegal and pathetic is clearly both idiotic and inadequate.
Jesus, Mary and Ralph- where does it stop? Stealing washcloths and towels from the hospital where you work? A computer from your local Best Buy? After all, you buy lots of inkjet cartridges and CDs there. A golf cart from your country club?
It's time to let go of any sense of entitlement you have and ASK THE GODDAMN WAITER OR BARTENDER IF YOU CAN BUY A GLASS FROM THEM. Otherwise, as marcia said-
Grow the hell up. If you're old enough to be on your own, you're old enough to supply your own kitchenware, etc.
The 'rite of passage' horse manure holds no more water than if you were describing other crimes, like drunk driving or date rape. One may be a more serious version than the other, but you can bet your cotton socks it's the same damn thing- a crime.
"But, on the other hand, who hasn’t taken the odd souvenir from a bar?"
I haven't.
But thanks to you and the other people who think that stealing is perfectly acceptable as long as it isn't a big ticket item, the actual price I pay goes up because the business has to cover the cost of replacement.
Congratulations, Helena. You are a true tribute to humanity for setting us straight that petty theft is just A-OK in your book.
You brave, brave soldier.
Anybody who is older than let's say 25 or 26 and has a cupboard full of assorted barware is a hillbilly!
We got pint glasses from a restaurant supply store cheap. Same for our everyday wine glasses. See if you've got one in your area that will sell them in less-than-case amounts.
I have beautiful drinking glasses that i registered for for my wedding last year. They are still neatly packed away, as I can't bear to get rid of the 20 or so glasses I currently use - all stolen from bars! That collection is way more sentimental, each with a blurry story of an awesome night out back in my days of being single....
Empty Classico pasta sauce jars make excellent pint glasses.
Also, Kmart has cheap glassware.
It's this simple: It doesn't belong to you; you take it; it's stealing. Stealing is wrong. Didn't your mama teach you that?
If this were your own kid saying this to you, would you tell hem it's okay to be a thief?
Now is a good time to decide which side of the issue you're on: honest or dishonest.
My aunt's friend took a wine glass from the restaurant where I had my graduation party from college and gave it to me later as a souvenir, since the glass had the restaurant's name on it. Sure, not the best idea, but I really think everyone is taking this issue way too seriously. If someone steals one item in their life that's under $5, big deal. People steal things from their office, like pads of paper, pens, etc. You can't possibly equate it to stealing something much larger and more expensive.
And yes, stealing is illegal, but so are many other things like possession of pot, speeding...things that much of the public has done. Note: I am not advocating stealing. Just saying that if someone has stolen a pint glass or two over the course of their life, big deal. Now if stealing pint glasses led to them stealing more expensive items, or stealing frequently, then there's a problem.
I am surprised that no one has mentioned that stealing from a restaurant is ...exactly the same as stealing from anyone else. I own a restaurant. You steal my glasses, it's exactly the same thing as reaching into my pocket and taking two bucks. I notice someone up there has her good glassware packed away and uses her stolen barware instead. Would she feel okay if someone stole her good stuff? After all, she didn't pay for it!
People forget that restaurants are owned by...human beings.
"Me me me! It's all about me!" -- that's the mantra of this column. Which is sort of ironic, since the whole point of manners is thinking about how your behavior impacts others.
Anyway, good work Helena: saying that it's "lame" to steal from bars doesn't mitigate the previous paragraphs of detailed instructions for lying and stealing. Since when is either of those actions *ever* good manners? I think Helena should go back to writing advice for her college newspaper, since that's obviously the type of people her advice is geared to. Can we get a grown-up in here giving grown-up advice, or at least, advice on how to act like a grown-up? Or would that turn off the 20-somethings who are obviously the target audience for most of the features on this site?
Stealing is lame.
This "advice" item in a nutshell (as it should have appeared if someone can explain to me why it would need to appear):
Q: IS IT OKAY TO STEAL THINGS?
A: NO.
@ Ruth Lafler
I'm a twenty-something, and I'd be appalled to see someone advocating stealing in my college newspaper. Furthermore, I'm a college student living in a University-subsidized apartment, and.... seriously, I own glasses of my own. And I paid for them too! I can understand the accidental theft of one glass/spoon/etc (before I moved out of the dorms I used to walk out of the dining hall with silverware all the time simply because I wasn't thinking-- however, our food bills actually had a $40 charge for accidentally stolen dishes anyway), but premeditated crime is not okay, whether you're young or a college student or "saving for a trip" (it's been said before, but if you can pay for a $6 drink at a bar you can pay for a $6 set of glasses at Target-- heck, Walmart if you're REALLY strapped). Stealing is bad.
Not all bars can get their pint glasses for frees. This is illegal in some jurisdictions. You should offer to buy them. Odds are, if you are a regular, they would give you a few for free. Or you can just go to a restaurant supply store and get them dirt cheap.
I love the circular reasoning - "they have a budget for that sort of thing" - year, we restaurateurs have a budget for that sort of thing because there are people like the questioner's boyfriend who steal from us and we have no other option. It's not like we planned the budget with the intention of offering up theft as an option for our customers. And beyond that the "I'm saving up for a trip", and the fact that the poster is going out for drinks in the first place both mean she can afford a couple of glasses at her local store.
This is completely appalling. Too proud to go to a thrift store? They have glasses galore.
helena, to the extent you brought us facts and quotes to back them up, and addressed a thorny, interesting, mildly scintillating issue -- thanks! that said, i don't think it's ever actually even occurred to me to steal anything from a bar, so i have to take issue with your "who hasn't taken the odd souvenir from a bar?" comment, as a few other posters have. i'm with those who note that if you can afford a drink at a bar, you can afford stemware that's at least as nice as the stemware you'll drink out of, at the bar. stealing's bad, m'kay?
People, please, stop stealing. You have Cost Plus, 99 Cents Only, and so many other options.
I agree with soupkitten and the others who suggest simply asking to buy one. When I was in England a couple of years ago, I asked the bartender at the pub if I could buy one of the beer glasses with the emblem on it as a souvenir to bring home for my husband. She thought for a second and just handed me one gratis.
I can't remember the name of the bar but all of their pint glasses say:
"I stole this glass from "This bar".
Hilarious. I don't know why I haven't stolen any yet. Probably because I dont know where it is.
Good talk.
I can't remember the name of the bar but all of their pint glasses say:
"I stole this glass from "This bar".
Hilarious. I don't know why I haven't stolen any yet. Probably because I dont know where it is.
Good talk.
I have to admit I stole alot of glasses in my bar hopping days. I was "cured" when I got a call to come p/u my misplaced purse at the police station one morning. The officer sat me at a desk and emptied each item out to verify ownership. It just so happened their was a bottle of Friday's mustard in there.
I was totally humiliated (but not arrested!)
For pete's sake, thrift stores are loaded with cheap (practically free) coffee mugs, glasses, hell, even crystal. Get off your lazy butt and go find the cheap stuff. Haven't you ever heard of a garage sale?
. . . what I think is just hilarious is that here she explains how to steal from bars and restaurants, but in just a few articles ahead, it's not okay for you to tip waiters that give you shitty service. So hardworking people that provide me great service at my favorite local bar don't deserve my money, but snot-nosed waiters that would know customer service if it hit them in the ass do deserve my money?
Oh what's the problem? I do this all the time. And sometimes when a friend has invited me over for dinner and it was good I'll take one of her glasses as a souvenir. Or a fork or something. And don't get me started about souvenirring trips to Macy's when I need some nice wine glasses.
"No, Helena doesn't advocate stealing beer glasses, but she does advocate lying. And, no, I've never stolen anything from a bar."
Nice point. I have to say that I honestly can't take much of Helena's advice very seriously anymore. Seriously, Helena? You're telling people the best way to pinch glassware from a bar? Sure, it can cost the bar lots of money but why not give some advice on how to do it anyway?
As for the lady who asked the question: as many people have already made the point: be resourceful! As for her syntax, did she actually ask if she could "just go and help [herself]". WOW!!! How would it be if someone came over to your house and just helped themselves to your things. Oh wait, don't you budget for that? Well maybe you should start. If your friends' integrity and morals are anywhere near as shallow and unscrupulous as your own you might want to adjust your budget for that trip.
just go to ikea and spend a few bucks for your own bar glasses....Geez, and people say us Jews are cheap.......
I got 16 glasses tall and short for 5$ at Deals. The are great and attractive. I do admit I took 1 pint glass from the on campus bar at UEA in England when I was visiting a friend there as a souvenir (I was living in Spain where we didn't drink pints- let alone beer in many cases).