The Strategic Wedding Registry
Think outside the box when it comes
to gifts
When you get married, people buy you gifts. It doesn’t matter if you live in a tiny apartment or you don’t believe in having stuff you don’t need or you asked for donations to a charity instead. People are going to buy you things—probably big things, like a large bowl, which seems to have become the default wedding gift.
Your best defense against unwanted items is your registry. By being mindful and strategic (and thinking beyond salespeople’s suggestions), and considering what as well as where you register, you can make your choices practical, green, and fun. We’ve included ideas for products and registries you may not have thought of.
If you use an online registry, consider Wishpot, which allows you to combine items from different sites into one wish list accessible by your friends and family. It works like this: Download the Wishpot software to add a button to your browser’s toolbar. Every time you see something you want (be it a Breville toaster from Williams-Sonoma or vintage Fiesta ware from a mom-and-pop antiques dealer), hit the button and the program pulls the product info into your registry.
COOKWARE
Different materials work better for different things, so mix and match pots instead of buying a set. You may want a nonstick frying pan for omelets, a pretty copper chef’s pan for dinner-party-worthy risotto, and a cast iron, enamel-covered Dutch oven for chili. See below for the pros and cons of some of the better cookware materials.
Copper
Pros: Gorgeous. It heats up and cools down quickly, so if you’re making something like a sabayon, a copper pot is nice to have.
Cons: A pain to keep bright. Even if you’re not using your pots, you have to clean them so they don’t oxidize. They can’t go in the dishwasher, don’t work on induction cooktops, and don’t handle acidic food like tomato sauce well.
Bottom line: Not a must-have, unless you love the look.
Stainless Steel
Pros: Diffuses heat, so you don’t get hot spots when you’re cooking. It’s durable, easy to clean, and dishwasher safe.
Cons: It takes a long time to heat up and cool down. Food sticks to it pretty easily.
Bottom line: A great basic.
Cast Iron
Pros: Great heat retention, good for slow-cooking or frying, whether you’re using plain cast iron (like that sold by Lodge) or enameled cast iron (like that made by Le Creuset). It’s also great for searing a steak, and it can go from stovetop to oven without worry. Enameled cast iron is easy to clean: You can use soap on it, and it’s dishwasher safe.
Cons: It’s very heavy: It can be nearly impossible to pick up a pot with one hand. It takes a while to warm up and cool down. If you’re using plain cast iron, it can be hard to clean (you’re not supposed to use soap, because it ruins the seasoning).
Bottom line: A great basic, but plain cast iron requires a little care.
Calphalon
Pros: Nonstick material (similar to Teflon) that’s easy to use and great for frying pans. It’s lightweight and durable, and the coating won’t flake off quickly the way cheaper nonstick surfaces might.
Cons: Nonstick surfaces can emit toxic fumes if heated above a certain temperature, but unless you leave your pan on the burner for a while with nothing in it, it typically won’t get that hot. Metal tools will scratch the surface and make the pots and pans worthless. Calphalon is not dishwasher safe.
Bottom line: Good for frying pans.
Lessley Anderson is senior editor at CHOW.
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The Strategic Wedding Registry (cont.)
Alternative Registries
Charity registries.
If helping others rather than getting a better mixer is more your style, try signing up for an online charity registry such as the I Do Foundation.
Honeymoon registries.
These sites allow you to plan your honeymoon—from the airfare to the mud baths—and your guests to pay for these activities. Honeyfund is one of the few that don’t charge a service fee.
Adventure registries.
At Cloud 9 Living, wedding guests can buy you “experiences,” like dune buggying in Las Vegas or spelunking in Texas. You select a geographic region, price, and type of adventure (among the types are “driving,” “water & snow,” and “action & adventure”), and then choose from a range of activities.
GLASSWARE
Glasses break all the time. If you register for pricey glasses, it’ll cost you that much more to replace your set when you break them.
You don’t need a bunch of different-size glasses. Get something versatile that works for what you drink most often. Tall water glasses, for example, can double as highballs. Attractive juice glasses can work as tumblers. Unique tumblers look sharp holding everything from milk to wine. Riedel “O”s do the job as wineglasses, juice glasses, and tumblers. Bodum double-walled glasses could hold a martini, orange juice, wine, or milk. And you can serve just about anything in a goblet.
PLATES
Measure your cupboards, dishwasher, and table, and compare to plate sizes. “We registered for chargers [big plates], and they didn’t fit on our table,” says Margaret Magnarelli, a New York–based magazine editor.
People who never eat off china often register for it anyway, because they worry it’s their only chance to get such a luxury item. But you won’t use china as often as you think, and your tastes may change, making the pattern you love now seem dated in a few years. CHOW recommends picking out neutral, dishwasher-safe dishes that can be used every day, but that are elegant enough for entertaining when dressed up with the right serving pieces and linens. The classy French porcelain line Apilco is a good bet. Or the Eva Zeisel collection. If and when your tastes change, the subtle patterns won’t be annoying, and you can switch them up with colored or patterned chargers and salad plates.
If you’re worried about space, don’t sign up for salad and dessert plates. Inexpensive appetizer plates can double as both, and they’re a classy addition at parties.
FLATWARE
Things to consider:- You don’t need tiny forks, because how often are you going to eat oysters?
- Pieces that have a lot of curlicues and details are going to wear strangely, and dings will be more noticeable.
- Think about how a piece feels in your mouth (yes, most stores will let you put flatware in your mouth) and in your hand.
- Will you want to use it every day?
- Remember, your tastes will change. You may have liked the Tuscany look three years ago, but now you’re into midcentury modern. Choose simple flatware, and you’ll probably like it longer.
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The Strategic Wedding Registry (cont.)
APPLIANCES
Be realistic about whether you’ll actually use something. If you never bake, for instance, do you honestly need a KitchenAid stand mixer? Research each product. Is this juicer easy to clean? Is that blender dishwasher-safe? Finally, reconsider registering for items that serve only one purpose. Panini can be made in a grill pan with a weight on top, not just in a panini press. An immersion hand blender can be used to purée soups and make smoothies, pesto, and other things a food processor or blender can do, with half the bulk.
Here are some appliances CHOW likes that you might not have thought of:- Toaster oven: It works not just as a toaster, but also as an energy-saving oven for small portions.
- Pressure cooker: You’ll be dumbstruck at how quickly you can make things in one of these babies. You can cook unsoaked black beans in a mere 15 minutes.
- Smoker: It goes outside, so it doesn’t take up counter or cabinet space. And you can make your own smoked trout, brisket, or bacon.
- Electric coffee grinder: Fresh beans make better coffee. If you have a spare, it can serve as a dedicated spice grinder.
- Rice cooker: It’s not hard to make rice with a pot and some water, but if you eat a lot of it, the effortlessness of a rice cooker is hard to beat.
ENTERTAINING
Think about what kind of entertainer you are and select your gadgets accordingly. Do you make cocktails, or do you just wish you did? (If it’s the latter, bar tools will collect dust.) Do you throw big bashes, small dinner parties with just a few friends, or large, seated affairs? Do you have an outdoor space for barbecues?
Here are some items for entertaining that CHOW likes and that you may not have considered:- A great grill for warm-weather cooking.
- Plastic outdoor plates for picnics or meals on the deck.
- Wide, flat-bottomed serving trays to hold things like deviled eggs and crudités that would otherwise fall into a pile on curved-bottom serveware.
- An ice crusher for making fruity drinks, Mint Juleps, and the like.
- A travel bar, so you can show up at parties and pour drinks for people, or ensure vacation rentals won’t be without proper cocktails.
- A big coffee urn for the end of the party.
- A hand citrus juicer for margaritas, ceviche, and more. This one works on both lemons and limes.
- A seltzer bottle and CO2 chargers so you can make your own fizzy water—no more wasteful Crystal Geyser bottles.
- A warming tray to keep food hot at parties.
MISCELLANEOUS
Depending on your interests, these might be worth putting on your list:
- Really good wine to start your collection
- Cooking classes
- Silpat baking sheets
- Heat-resistant spatulas
- A splatter screen
- A Microplane grater
- Bulk storage containers
- Two of the same knives, so you can prep alongside your partner
- A Tupperware Cake Taker
- A silicone rolling pin
- A Champion juicer
- A really good trash can
- An antique Wedgewood stove or a retro fridge
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The Strategic Wedding Registry (cont.)
Registry Tips Avoid getting stuff you don’t want, having to pay return fees, and other pitfalls.
Investigate Return Policies
Inevitably you’ll have to send a gift or two back. Will the store pay the return shipping? Will it give you a full refund, allow you to exchange, or neither? One couple CHOW interviewed registered for more things than they needed so they could return some gifts for cash. Crass? Yes. But it worked for them. Another couple had to pay for shipping to return an entire wine-storage system that was the wrong size.
Look into Price Breaks on Finishing Your Registry
Some outfits, like Williams-Sonoma, offer newlyweds a chance to buy the things from their registry that they didn’t get as gifts at a discount (10 percent in W-S’s case) up to a year after the wedding date.
Find Out If Your Retailer Allows You to Reallocate Funds
If you register at a store like Michael C. Fina, and you notice that, say, only a few glasses have been purchased from your registry and all but one of the plates, you could put a stop on the glasses order and redirect that money toward buying the last plate. (Of course, this makes writing thank-you notes a bit confusing.)
Consider All Seasons
If you’re registering in December, you might not think of insulated pint glasses or grill tools. Planning your registry well ahead of time allows you to visit a store during different seasons, so you can get a fuller picture of its inventory.
Don’t Forget the Flair
People buy “off-registry” because they want their gifts to seem personal, unique, and memorable. The irony is that brides and grooms would, in most cases, rather have what they registered for. To increase the odds that people will buy from your registry, put plenty of things on your list that have flair. Like the sexiest teapot ever or a hydroponic vegetable-growing system.
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