If you decide to take the "scenic northern route", this is an interesting joint:
http://www.luandjoes.com/main/Welcome...

One of my favorite memories as a child was watching the French Chef.
On one episode, Julia made some sort of really fancy hamburger with all sorts of things added to the ground beef. At the end of the show, you could almost picture the producer circleing his finger to tell her to hurry up....
She took the patty so carefully constructed, slapped it in a pan, flipped it over and slapped it in a bun. Opening her mouth wide, she says "Bon appetit" and shoved the raw thing in her mouth.
The screen went black at that moment. I figure she spit it out.
All that said, I loved the show.

I used to drive ATL to Albany and back pretty regularly. My habit was to take I-75 down and backroads up to Columbus, GA to I-85 return.
I found this to be my "go to" spot in Columbus:
http://www.countrysbarbecue.com/
Your vegan friends can eat sides..... you can eat decent burnt pig. ;-)

Not a hidden door but pretty funny anyhow.
Years ago I was in a place where the bathrooms were just past the bar. Between the men's and ladie's room was a fountain with a little cherub uhhhhhhh, whizzing into the pool below. The wall was covered with plasic ivy but the piece covering the cherub's naughty bits was hooked to a switch. If you so much as touched it, a red flashing light would go off over the bar so everyone could turn and see who the pervert was.
Can't for the life of me remember where it was.... a sure sign of traveling too much.

More than once, when I've been faced with the same dilema, I've asked if it's on the house. And every time the answer has been, "of course".
I figure it's a way of the bartender to increase his/her's tips.
But, there again, I'm a pretty cynical guy.

"How do you pronounce most foreign menu words?"

Incorrectly.
I've never found it to be a big problem. And, sometimes, I learn new words/phrases/

I don't run into that problem.
Whenever someone asks if they can "help" I say, "Yes, get the hell outta my kitchen...."
I suppose that I may not be quite as polite as you.....

My dad and his brother had pet ducks growing up. Donald and Daisy, naturally.
Well, at least my dad thought they were pets.... until granpa snapped their necks & handed 'em to grandma to prepare for dinner.
Broke his little heart.... but he did say they were tasty. ;-)

Slim Jims, jerky, smokies
Bacon..... How can you leave out bacon????

So, the dog learns to bark at the guest to get him to leave.... because he knows that, when there's guests, he gets no table scraps.....

One word: Pancakes

Can you say salt?.... Lots and lots of salt, and then a lot more...
Haven't been to that particular location but, since it 's a chain, wouldn't expect anything less.

Well, if your dad was anything like mine, he noticed.... believe me, he noticed. But, he was okay with it as long as it didn't get out of hand..... Most dads were kids once too.

Here in Northeast Ohio, we have a small producer:
http://www.griffinciderworks.com/home...

Best I've had in the US but a bit pricey
A bit hard to find also......

If you're gonna do it, might as well go all the way.....
Toast the bread in some of the bacon grease.
Yummy!!!!

Is he too rich 'n snooty to enjoy a batch of home made chocolate chip cookies? Shows a much more personal touch than just going out and spending money just to spend it.

Why wouldn't you call in a pro to both get rid of the critters and find where they might be getting inside????? Chosing between the dish rack and the dishwasher isn't really the issue.

I would've just brought it to the server's attention. Let her know that normally you would tip 20% or more and tha if she only wanted the 18% that was fine with you.
If there was some sort of action by the management, that would be the opportunity to let you know and you could settle it with the manager.

Was the pilfer-proof cap band* still attached to the cap?
If so most likely, it was a short fill that got through QC at the bottling plant.
In any case, did you bring it to the store managment's attention? If someone has been slurping in the aisle, I'm sure they would like to know and make sure the product doesn't get into a customer's hands.
If it was just a short fill, they'll either make the bottler replace it or shrug their shoulders and toss it out.

*-I'm always amazed at folks that will use a product that has compromised pilfer protection.

If you want to entertain yerself for a while, try to re-assemble a chicken like object from the pieces they give you in a bucket. Endless fun trying to figure out where some of it belongs.

Yes, most times the baking soda is going to do the trick.
I would still have an extinguisher handy though.... I just happen to have one hanging outside the door leading from kitchen to garage. Haven't had to use it yet.
I'm the son, son-in-law, brother-in-law, cousin, grandson and uncle of firefighters. I've seen too many aftermaths of not being prepared..... Fire has no soul and no mercy.

Perhaps your family is "coversation starved" and have nothing else interesting to talk about.
Me? Wouldn't give it a second thought

With any open flame in use, please make sure you know where the nearest fire extinguisher is and how to use it.
It seems silly but, you never know if someone might get a bit overzealous with the "full contact fondue" and knock the thing over.
Have fun & stay safe

The way I deal with my wife's family, that put the "fun" in disfunctional, is to busy myself in the kitchen.
If anyone asks if they can help, they will get the standard response; "Help? Yes, stay the hell out of my kitchen!"
After dinner, i'll busy myself cleaning up the wreckage in the kitchen....and drinking a bit... Okay, drinking more than a bit....
So, most of my social interaction with the family is on a "fly-by" basis.

Exit 161-Interstate 71 southwest of Cleveland:
The Brew Kettle
8377 Pearl Rd
Strongsville OH 44136
Directions would be a bit convoluted. GPS or a map program might come in handy.
Decent BBQ (for Ohio) and some really good beers..... Although that might not be a good plan if you're traveling.....

Exit 173-Interstate 77/route 21 south of Cleveland:
Whitey's Booze 'n Burgers
3600 Brecksville Rd (route 21)
Richfield OH 44286
Outstanding burgers 'n chili

A bit south on route 21 is
Gasoline Alley
870 North Cleveland Massillon Road (Yes, it's still route 21)
Akron, OH 44333
"Where you can sit between a millionaire and the guy that cuts his lawn...."

I'll let others living closer to the other exits chime in from here.

Same sort of bittersweet experience here.
Three years ago it turns out I cooked my dad's last supper. He passed away the next morning unexpectatly.
So, although I enjoy the cooking for guests, I advise them that it might very well be their last meal. Life is so fleeting.

Eating a late lunch in a Goldon Colorado restaurant so only myself and one other gentleman as customers. The waitress was friendly and a bit chatty but I really didn't think much of it. Until she sits down and starts eating french fries off the other guy's plate....
From that point, I guarded my food like a junkyard dog....
And felt like a complete idiot when he pays his check, gives her a kiss and says, "See you at home..."
Turns out it was her dad.

My response for anyone offering "help" when I'm in the kitchen?
"Stay the hell outta my way!!! And the best help you can give is to go visit with everyone else that's leaving me alone."
But, there again, in grade school I used to get "Doesn't play well with others" on my report card.

Are you guys serious????
The lad is 17 years old. If some girl is interested enough to come over for dinner, PB&J would be enough to get her to swoon.
Make something that you already know you can do without getting her sick has to be the number one goal.

I love Hendrick's Gin. But it gives me weird dreams..... That for the life of me I cannot remember any part of the dream. I just wake up knowing it was weird.
Nothing else affects me that way, Strange eh?