To answer my own question (should the restaurant ask?) I've found that even when my friend orders a "5" (on a scale of 1-5) it isn't spicy enough for him, so it is probably better to just always get pepper sauce on the side.

The other day at an Asian/Japanese/Chinese/That restaurant, my Pad Thai was served completely void of any heat. It was indeed delicious, so I didn't complain, but I did ask for pepper sauce. Which was very hot, and difficult to disperse through the dish after-the-fact.

Maybe I need a Thai word that can be communicated to the chef that means "he says he likes it medium hot, but he's an American so take it easy on him."

Too many posters don't add a record when they post in a discussion. If they type the restaurant name into the link field and the restaurant isn't in the restaurant database, they need to go ahead and add it, but evidently most people won't do that. And face it, you'd need to know the proper name of the restaurant and the name of the city, at the very least.

> we have been working with our Restaurant data provider

I see that this is the last post from ChowHQ (October) so maybe they have stopped working on the site. This lack of a viable link between discussions and the restaurant database remains a tremendous problem with the site. It would be nice if posters could add a restaurant they recommend whenever it doesn't automatically pop up in their discussion, but that might be too much to hope for. As it is, often finding a restaurant is detective work, especially if the poster got the spelling incorrect or doesn't mention the city.

I still have hope for this board over other boards like Yelp because I respect the opinions of many CHs, but traveling to a new city and trying to do research on Chow is almost not worth it.

"The way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

This holds true for me, but the gender bias does not. It is possibile that I am a better cook than you, but I still like being pampered with my favorites.

Chow needs a dating thread:

55 YO DWM d/d-free Chowhound seeks financially secure woman for food adventures in the Rockville - Germantown - MOCO area.

Should your Thai restaurant ask you how spicy you want your dish on a scale from 1-5, regardless of whether there is a little chili next to the menu item?

There's a diner at exit 12 popular with Cararet locals, Kinda a dive.
I love the name, Bus Stop Luncheonette.

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Bus Stop Luncheonette
793 Roosevelt Ave, Carteret, NJ 07008