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I Paid: $29.99 for a 750-milliliter bottle (prices may vary by region)
A 30-proof beverage described as "a perfect nectar of French white wine, ultra-premium French vodka, French sparkling wine, exotic fruit flavors, and a touch of carbonation," NUVO was created by a guy named Raphael Yakoby in partnership with the spirits conglomerate Diageo. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that this appears to be a rare case of "French-washing."
I pulled out my bottle of NUVO ("L'Esprit de Paris") at a gathering of dudes, and it provoked reactions ranging from stunned wonder to jocular contempt. This pink liqueur comes in a bottle that is somehow simultaneously evocative of a lipstick applicator, a fancy shoe, and perfume. It's trying with such passionate conviction to look girly, I was secretly hoping it would pull the liquor equivalent of cross-dressing and pack the smoky wallop of a good Highland Scotch.
No such luck.
Rather than inspiring murmurs of delight, NUVO had our tasters exclaiming, "BLEARGH," "DUDE," and "OOF" in disgust, as they shoved their glasses aside. You're probably wondering: Why did I taste this girly product with a bunch of straight dudes? Wouldn't it have been more appropriate to test it with women? My thinking was: The dudes would not be swayed by the marketing to like NUVO more than it deserved. And it did not deserve much, particularly when you consider that this stuff is priced as much as a really good bottle of wine. It distinctly tasted like gummy bears dissolved in lightly carbonated lemon Pledge sweetened with aspartame.
Oh, and the slogan? Calling this stuff "the spirit of Paris" is the equivalent of spitting on a day-old gyro and calling it "the spirit of New York." But NUVO does get points for the packaging, which is both incredibly striking and incredibly coherent—you know exactly what it's supposed to be, and who is supposed to buy it. Just don't buy it if you want something that actually tastes good.
James, what were you thinking? You should have poured it into a different bottle before letting the men taste it. Of course the original bottle was a distraction. Of course the men WERE swayed by the marketing.
there isn't a French person anywhere who would put all that crap into one bottle (we'll skip the guy sleeping on the bench down in the Metro - he drinks shoe polish and cough medicine, so his opinion doesn't count)
I love the description, no matter what it tastes like.
Two hilarious sentences here. Kudos, Mr. Norton
mmmm...it's the aspartame that makes it so special.
Hey, us straight guys like "girly" drinks too! They need only taste good.
Marketing! A recent trip to a huge liquor store with 15 year-old in tow drove that point home. Wowed by flashy displays, she was attracted to the bright, shiny, sexy-shaped hot-pink, silver, fluorescent green, sparkle-flecked foreign/exotic-sounding products hawked by cardboard celebrity cutouts. Here comes the next generation of customers! Cartoon up! Catch the next Disney Generation wave! Too...+READ
Marketing! A recent trip to a huge liquor store with 15 year-old in tow drove that point home. Wowed by flashy displays, she was attracted to the bright, shiny, sexy-shaped hot-pink, silver, fluorescent green, sparkle-flecked foreign/exotic-sounding products hawked by cardboard celebrity cutouts. Here comes the next generation of customers! Cartoon up! Catch the next Disney Generation wave! Too bad pink panther's busy selling insulation.-COLLAPSE
It also looks super phallic. I had the misfortune to have tried a free sample in a bar once. I'm still trying to scrub my soul clean.
I was confused by the title because I thought this was going to be rant about hating French liquors in general. Perhaps a hyphen between Supposedly and French would make more sense.