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Dear Helena,
In the past, I've found there is no more surefire way to delight your dinner guests than to bring out a homemade pie. But these days I often find that people are uninterested in dessert, or ask for "just a teeny-tiny sliver." Maybe it's something to do with getting older, and therefore having more friends who are concerned about their waistlines. But I've always thought that it's rude not to serve both an entrée and dessert. If you can't be bothered to at least offer some ice cream, it looks like you haven't made an effort. But I don't want to go to the trouble if half my guests would genuinely prefer to avoid the "empty calories." Do most people secretly wish you would not offer dessert? Will I be a better hostess to skip it?
—Pie Is Passé
Dear Pie Is Passé,
Some people simply prefer to end a meal on a savory note, and it's not because they're worried about calories. When I was dining at Heirloom Café in San Francisco recently, Matt Straus, the chef, told me that another guest had ordered the burger—for dessert. In England, up until the Edwardian period, the male dinner-party guests at least often concluded the meal with a light savory course, such as anchovy toast. And as you can see from this thread, there are plenty of Chowhounds who would prefer to end a meal with cheese rather than chocolate.
Of course, there are also people who don't feel that a meal is complete without sugar. Therefore you should always provide something sweet. It doesn't have to be a homemade Sachertorte. I once went to a dinner party where the last course was a pear (obviously this only works if it's quality fruit, not tasteless, out-of-season stuff). Gabrielle Hamilton, the chef at Prune in New York, scorns sweets so much that she refused to serve cake even at her wedding, and she doesn't make dessert when she entertains. But she always provides a little something for sugar-lovers. "We always have a hunk of chocolate, and I do love the candied citrus rinds."
But even if you offer chocolates instead of dessert, you should still serve a final course, because it's smart dinner-party psychology. The "peak-end rule" says that how positively you remember something is largely dictated by what happens at the end of the experience. So if you want to provide a truly memorable dinner, you are thus best off serving mediocre beef stew followed by a flaming, brandy-doused pyramid of profiteroles, rather than a great stew followed by store-bought chocolate.
If you're looking for a savory last course that has the wow factor of profiteroles, consider serving an unusual cheese. Instead of wedding cake, Hamilton offered "a burrata made in the south of Italy that we served by itself, with spoons." Or you might finish with a homemade digestif; it's easy to make your own. A friend of mine once served nocino liqueur made with green walnuts she had gathered herself from a tree in her mother-in-law's garden. That was just as memorable as any cake or pie.
I love to throw dinner parties but I do want the main course to shine so for dessert I will offer a sweet, single nibble, or dessert amuse-busche, for each guest. Kinda putting the cherry on the sundae if you will. I've gotten better responses to that.
I read somewhere that the frequency of ordering desserts in restaurants is way down and, as a result, more restaurants are outsourcing the desserts that they do serve and severely limiting their dessert menu choices. They figure that there is no sense in spending a lot of time preparing fresh, "in-house" desserts that mostly will not be ordered. If ordering desserts in restaurants is declining...+READ
I read somewhere that the frequency of ordering desserts in restaurants is way down and, as a result, more restaurants are outsourcing the desserts that they do serve and severely limiting their dessert menu choices. They figure that there is no sense in spending a lot of time preparing fresh, "in-house" desserts that mostly will not be ordered. If ordering desserts in restaurants is declining (about which I have no information, other than what I read in this one article), I think it is sad.
It also creates a negative feedback loop. That is, if we assume that outsourced desserts are less fresh, less tasty, and, usually, less imaginative, people who do order them, will like them less, resulting in less ordering of desserts in the future, resulting in less demand for desserts, etc., etc., etc.
One could also attribute the decline in the ordering of desserts (if it exists) to the trend toward bigger portions of food in restaurants, resulting in less remaining hunger at the end of the meal, and, therefore, less ordering of desserts.
My personal experience is that at dinner parties, women feel guilty about the amount of calories they consumed at the meal (and express this guilt repeatedly) and, therefore, to assuage their guilt, they forego the dessert. On the other hand, my observation is that women ALWAYS feel guilty about the amount of calories they consumed, even if all they had was a cup of tea and a celery stick. Hence, the term "sinfully delicious" placed before any successful dessert. The reasoning seems to be that if you ate the dessert, you sinned! (There also seems to be a subtext here: if you enjoyed what you ate, it was a sin.)
I find that if I put out the dessert as a buffet item (after a formal, sit-down dinner), along with coffee, guests will help themselves later. People who would have declined the offer of dessert at the table (immediately after the meal) are somehow more inclined to eat the dessert half an hour later--when they do not feel so publicly on display. Also, since they are serving themselves, they get to control portion size, something over which they have only limited control at the table.-COLLAPSE
The last time I had a dinner party, I offered 'dessert' on two trays. I made individual servings for each tray and guests could try one or both. One contained a small creme brulee' and the other was some fruit chunks and a side of chocolate sauce. It was very simple to put together and the guests loved the variety
I definitely agree with jennifer98000 that granita is wonderful, and i am a big fan of the really course granita that is homemade. I personally have been skipping making traditional pie and cake deserts lately and instead have been offering gelato or ice cream. You can do bananas foster or cherry jubilee for a toping, when was the last time you pulled out the homemade icecream freezer and rock...+READ
I definitely agree with jennifer98000 that granita is wonderful, and i am a big fan of the really course granita that is homemade. I personally have been skipping making traditional pie and cake deserts lately and instead have been offering gelato or ice cream. You can do bananas foster or cherry jubilee for a toping, when was the last time you pulled out the homemade icecream freezer and rock salt? It is freakin easy and easy clean up! I will often bring out the icecream freezer during happy hour at my bar, with self service bottles of grenadine, chocolate (i had it for mudslides anyway) and whiped cream it makes for a unique and welcomed happy hour feast.-COLLAPSE
I love making dessert and wouldn't dream of not offering it. Of course everyone knows I make great desserts and they come expecting it! I'd be a little upset if all I got for dessert was a pear. I might be okay with cheese, but only if it's not blue cheese.
Dear Hostess - I need dessert. Preferably chocolate. Thank you.
Granita, granita, granita..... espresso granita...winter fruit granita, mint granita, jasmine granita, summer fruit granita etc etc it is fresh clears the palate...does not need to be a huge amount to have an effect....did it all summer added a small biscotti with a very low sugar level to it, crystalized mint leaves to a strawberry and white peach granita...it is a perfect party dessert
I'm with aggiecat. Pavlova is an amazing, non-filling, very light dessert. It can be barely more than egg whites and some fruit, or you can tart it up with drizzled melted chocolate and whipped cream for those who want it. I don't think I would ever have guests for dinner without offering a dessert, even if it's just passing a box of chocolates. But that's me, and I love a sweet after a fine...+READ
I'm with aggiecat. Pavlova is an amazing, non-filling, very light dessert. It can be barely more than egg whites and some fruit, or you can tart it up with drizzled melted chocolate and whipped cream for those who want it. I don't think I would ever have guests for dinner without offering a dessert, even if it's just passing a box of chocolates. But that's me, and I love a sweet after a fine meal. Or any other time!-COLLAPSE
Personally I do like sweets to conclude an evening. However, my prefered timing is probably different from most people. I don't even want to consider the sweets as a course... I prefer to finish the meal with the main course, and then, perhaps an hour or more later, have sweets with dessert wine. It is too overwhelming for me to finish all that meat and vegetables with a full stomach then try to...+READ
Personally I do like sweets to conclude an evening. However, my prefered timing is probably different from most people. I don't even want to consider the sweets as a course... I prefer to finish the meal with the main course, and then, perhaps an hour or more later, have sweets with dessert wine. It is too overwhelming for me to finish all that meat and vegetables with a full stomach then try to stuff myself silly with sweets. If I have to eat something right after main course I'd prefer it to be simple fruits. I suppose it would work well too if I simply eat a smaller main course and not have to wait as long for dessert.-COLLAPSE
I'm a Pavlova Lover so that's what I'd do. It's suitably light, fruity, and can be done in small individual portions with fruit in season. It can be preceeded or proceeded by a cheese course designed to compliment the fruit you use. It says, I made an effort. It is non-fat and light, and you can even do a totally sugar free version for those with sugar issues. It can easily be done ahead and...+READ
I'm a Pavlova Lover so that's what I'd do. It's suitably light, fruity, and can be done in small individual portions with fruit in season. It can be preceeded or proceeded by a cheese course designed to compliment the fruit you use. It says, I made an effort. It is non-fat and light, and you can even do a totally sugar free version for those with sugar issues. It can easily be done ahead and assembled at the last minute, looks very lovely and impressive but is dead easy to do.
Why folks don't do more Pavlovas is beyond me. Only caveat would be someone with egg allergies, but in that case, you trot out a sorbet and some small eggless cookies or biscotti. Sure it's supposed to be a palate cleaser between courses but, hey it's delicious, light and soubles a dessert too. Which also would be a good simple no-work dessert option for a last minute dinner.-COLLAPSE
I love cake and pie. I am supremely disappointed when there is not a good dessert. I cannot agree that fruit or fruit compote is a suitable replacement. People who don't care about dessert don't care, so why try to placate them with fruit? I can agree with the idea of serving many small portions. Yay! Then I can try lots of sweets!
I used to trot out spectacular desserts with coulis or chocolate and all the extras...tiramisu, mousse, etc., etc.
I now keep it *very* simple, and have come to generally just warm some sort of fruit (pineapple, bananas, sliced apples, pears, peaches, etc., etc., etc.) with a little brown sugar and an appropriate splash of rum, Cointreau, Calvados, etc....then it's a very light dessert by itself...+READ
I used to trot out spectacular desserts with coulis or chocolate and all the extras...tiramisu, mousse, etc., etc.
I now keep it *very* simple, and have come to generally just warm some sort of fruit (pineapple, bananas, sliced apples, pears, peaches, etc., etc., etc.) with a little brown sugar and an appropriate splash of rum, Cointreau, Calvados, etc....then it's a very light dessert by itself for those watching their weight, or a little splurge when spooned over a little good-quality vanilla ice cream. I usually serve some sort of light wafer-style cookie with it as a garnish.
Everyone seems to go for it...both the sweet and savoury people, as it doesn't overwhelm the cheese course that I've just offered (both are standard here in France), and lets people go as decadent as they'd like.-COLLAPSE
Perhaps it's a matter of feeling full and not wanting a big carb hit after the entree. I know my elderly family members absolutely love a bit of cake or pie, but would rather take a slice home to enjoy. As I've gotten older (a bit) I can relate. I truly enjoy a fabulous dinner, but have to consider my comfort and would rather have a generous snifter of sambuca or Grand Marnier as my "dessert."
...+READ
Perhaps it's a matter of feeling full and not wanting a big carb hit after the entree. I know my elderly family members absolutely love a bit of cake or pie, but would rather take a slice home to enjoy. As I've gotten older (a bit) I can relate. I truly enjoy a fabulous dinner, but have to consider my comfort and would rather have a generous snifter of sambuca or Grand Marnier as my "dessert."
If I'm the host, all the better. Leftover pie and cake are terrific for breakfast, along with some really good coffee.-COLLAPSE
Since baking is my forte, I'm in the camp of serving a lovely entree, and a killer dessert. However, I don't just serve 1 dessert. I also serve a citrus salad with gingered Greek yogurt. That way, there is a balance of tastes, and it seems to be appreciated. I always have ice cream & sorbet on hand, in case it is requested. My friends aren't into the cheese course concept. I was introduced to it...+READ
Since baking is my forte, I'm in the camp of serving a lovely entree, and a killer dessert. However, I don't just serve 1 dessert. I also serve a citrus salad with gingered Greek yogurt. That way, there is a balance of tastes, and it seems to be appreciated. I always have ice cream & sorbet on hand, in case it is requested. My friends aren't into the cheese course concept. I was introduced to it when I lived in the UK and traveled, but I can't seem to get my friends in the US to enjoy it.-COLLAPSE
There is a lot of room in between rich baked goods and something as simple as a pear (even a good one)- it doesn't have to be just one or the other. There are lots of cooked fruit-based desserts that are sweet and show some effort on the host's part, but are not overwhelmingly rich: compote, poached pears, etc. All can be accompanied by cookies and other optional supplements for those who do want...+READ
There is a lot of room in between rich baked goods and something as simple as a pear (even a good one)- it doesn't have to be just one or the other. There are lots of cooked fruit-based desserts that are sweet and show some effort on the host's part, but are not overwhelmingly rich: compote, poached pears, etc. All can be accompanied by cookies and other optional supplements for those who do want to indulge.-COLLAPSE
It's always a bit disheartening to produce a cake or tart and have only one or two people take a slice, and have to return it to the kitchen with a sense of rejection. Still, people usually appreciate something sweet to finish off their meal even if they don't want to commit to a whole slice or serving or something. I think that lots of little things are much more acceptable and people will take...+READ
It's always a bit disheartening to produce a cake or tart and have only one or two people take a slice, and have to return it to the kitchen with a sense of rejection. Still, people usually appreciate something sweet to finish off their meal even if they don't want to commit to a whole slice or serving or something. I think that lots of little things are much more acceptable and people will take one or two bite-sized pieces where they wouldn't have a whole portion of dessert, even if it actually adds up to much the same thing in the end. For example, little bite-sized fruit tarts, or beautifully candied strips of fruit, or really gorgeous gourmet chocolates, or candied nuts, etc, all served generously on a beautiful platter along with perhaps some grapes and other fresh fruit - and left there for people to pick at - is the best solution I think. For some reason people are much more willing to reach out and nibble on lots of sweet things than they are to say 'yes' and commit to a full-on dessert. You can leave this all out while you serve a dessert wine and coffee and digestifs and I'll bet a fair amount of it will get eaten, and if it doesn't, you don't feel nearly as sad as when you have to send a whole cake etc. back to the kitchen virtually untouched.-COLLAPSE
What about a good, ripe pear and a sexy piece of cheese, explorateur or something like that, and some toasted walnuts if you really wanted to gild the lily? Decadent, delicious and next to no fuss.
When I was single I always liked entertaining because I could bake something fancy that was impractical for one person (yes, I would eat it all, that was the problem).
What I like to do is move away from the table into the living room and digest for a little bit before serving dessert and coffee and tea. That way if people don't want dessert, they don't stand out, and you don't feel any...+READ
When I was single I always liked entertaining because I could bake something fancy that was impractical for one person (yes, I would eat it all, that was the problem).
What I like to do is move away from the table into the living room and digest for a little bit before serving dessert and coffee and tea. That way if people don't want dessert, they don't stand out, and you don't feel any pressure to eat it quickly.-COLLAPSE
Depending on your guest, you can't go wrong with fruit, cheese, and little chocolates.
I find after a long and wonderful meal, that the desert is that last mountain, that I just do not want to climb. I love pie and I want to taste it, but a 3" slice (meassured at the outter edge) is too much. I like a fruit and cheese platter. Something sweet is nice, but if you can serve something bite sized from a platter (ie. help yourself) Think appies but at the end of the meal. Baclava for...+READ
I find after a long and wonderful meal, that the desert is that last mountain, that I just do not want to climb. I love pie and I want to taste it, but a 3" slice (meassured at the outter edge) is too much. I like a fruit and cheese platter. Something sweet is nice, but if you can serve something bite sized from a platter (ie. help yourself) Think appies but at the end of the meal. Baclava for example-COLLAPSE
A selection of fruit would probably be appreciated by most people, and the hardcore sweet-tooth folks could probably be satisfied with a light liqueur-based sauce or fresh whipped cream over it.
as a guest I would never refuse to at least taste a course offered by the host without a really good reason (i.e. allergy or religion) Its just bad manners. Nothing wrong with a sliver though.
when hosting we always offer something sweet for those who need it - but it needs to be good - the points about ending the meal on a high note are well made. We ended our Christmas dinner with cheeses,...+READ
as a guest I would never refuse to at least taste a course offered by the host without a really good reason (i.e. allergy or religion) Its just bad manners. Nothing wrong with a sliver though.
when hosting we always offer something sweet for those who need it - but it needs to be good - the points about ending the meal on a high note are well made. We ended our Christmas dinner with cheeses, followed by a ginger cake with wihipped cream and coffee/liqueurs for those who wanted. It was a mellow end.
I would agree with the comment on proportionality conditionally - we find a small dinner with a big dessert to be unattractive. After all the dessert should just be a final filip on the meal not the biggest part. However, a light dessert - or small servings of a rich dessert - after a big meal seem like a good idea.-COLLAPSE
fruit is always good
The dessert should fit the meal......if you serve a light entree, then a heavier dessert is in order, and vice versa. I think the whole ritual of dessert is not just about eating more, but winding down the evening, and it's this you shouldn't skip. It's a chance to have tea or coffee if guests will be driving home, and an opportunity to change seats so that people can chat with someone who was...+READ
The dessert should fit the meal......if you serve a light entree, then a heavier dessert is in order, and vice versa. I think the whole ritual of dessert is not just about eating more, but winding down the evening, and it's this you shouldn't skip. It's a chance to have tea or coffee if guests will be driving home, and an opportunity to change seats so that people can chat with someone who was seated far away earlier in the evening.-COLLAPSE
Pie is good, but I'd turn it down simply because I have food allergies, but cheese and port is always a nice, and one can serve gingersnaps, lightly sweet wholemeal crackers or even quality chocolate with the cheese.
The guys in our group would definitely cry foul if we did not provide a dessert. Most of the women can take it or leave it....
I rarely eat dessert or sweets but if someone is treating me to a meal and they bring out a pie I will eat the bejesus out of that pie if it is homemade or even a good store-bought one ... a supermarket pie maybe not so much ... life is too short to pass up the opportunity for some good pie.
If I am eating at a restaurant on the other hand I'll pass on it unless I have reason to believe it is...+READ
I rarely eat dessert or sweets but if someone is treating me to a meal and they bring out a pie I will eat the bejesus out of that pie if it is homemade or even a good store-bought one ... a supermarket pie maybe not so much ... life is too short to pass up the opportunity for some good pie.
If I am eating at a restaurant on the other hand I'll pass on it unless I have reason to believe it is some damn good pie.-COLLAPSE
I always thought my mom was being trendy when she would do a port and cheese plate for afters... then I found out she just couldn't bake...but seriously...she taught me not to do a dessert if it was going to ruin the rest of the dinner...Example: recently at August in NOLA we had a great dinner all courses were spot on..then dessert came and it was horrid..brought the whole meal crashing down.
Most parties have boring desserts. I definitely skip it since the taste does not justify the calories.