Social Conservatives Target Extreme Ice-Cream Flavors

A raft of picketers engulfed San Francisco ice cream shop Humphry Slocombe early this week, protesting its sale of liquor-based ice cream to children. The shop has attained cult status for its funky, edgy flavors such as Secret Breakfast, containing bourbon and corn flakes, and Magnolia Thunderpussy beer ice cream.

"These flavors introduce small children to the taste of liquor," said Lionel Jahosifat, who carried a sign that read "Foodies Today, Alkies Tomorrow!" "So that by the time they hit grade school, they're ready for the hard stuff," Jahosifat continued. "And that's just not right."

Marlena Macintyre, another protester, pointed out that on this particular day, the shop's limited-edition sorbet was "Jesus Juice," containing wine and Coca-Cola. "Frankly, I think this ice cream flavor should be flat-out illegal," she said.

Humphry Slocombe did brisk business during and after the protest, upping its Twitter followers by roughly 500,000.

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