Dipping While Driving

In the most momentous fast food development since McDonald's debuted an ad campaign featuring a guy who wanted to have sex with his $1 double cheeseburger, Heinz is changing up its game and introducing a brand new style of ketchup packet.

Farewell to the messy, tiny, plastic-y little bags you need to tear with your teeth; hello to a new dunk-friendly model that holds three times as much ketchup (i.e., enough for at least part of an order of fries.)

Here's the slightly disturbing but ultimately understandable part of the story: The new packets were motivated in large part by concern that people were having too hard a time dipping their fries in ketchup while driving. Really! Here's the text from the ABC article about the new packets:

"Designers found that what worked at a table didn't work where many people use ketchup packets: in the car. So two years ago, Heinz bought a used minivan for the design team members so they could give their ideas a real road test."

It all works up to this little quotable gem:

"Moms everywhere wanted a packet that held enough ketchup for the meal and didn't squirt onto clothes so easily."

Well, moms everywhere, congratulations. You have made your frustrations known, and changed the world.